Sunday, May 1, 2011

A Short Post about a Loooong Process

The preface for Storzapretis, aka Corsican Spinach and Mint Gnocchi (pg 376) should spell out that it will take you the entirety of your lifetime to complete, and it will not be worth your effort. I started cooking this around 6. Dinner did not get on the table until 9:30. It took a few tries to get the hang of shaping the "quenelles" with two spoons, but that's the only thing I can think of that I could have done faster. The recipe didn't hide the stages, but I had no idea that I was in for 3.5 hours of constant work, besides the 30 minutes where the gnocchi cools in the fridge.

I always thought that gnocchi were, by definition, potato-based. That's all I've ever had, at least. My experience of them is that they're pretty firm and dense. I wanted to know how balls of ricotta cheese mixed with one egg, spinach, mint, a touch of flour, and a Swiss/Parmesan combo (she calls for gruyere, but almost all of her recipes do, and it's $9 a pop. I assume it's cheaper in France) could come out tasting or feeling like anything except a ball of flavored ricotta. I'll save you the time and answer the question: they can't.
They look cute now, but don't let 'em fool you. They have no intention of keeping their shape.
Once all the gnocchi were formed, then floured, then cooled, then boiled, then dunked in ice-water, then patted dry with a million paper towels, they are arranged in a dish and baked with tomato sauce and cheese until the sauce boils. Once served, the damn delicate darlings don't even hold their shape. What's the point? I could have just baked the un-boiled, un-shaped ricotta cheese under sauce and swiss, and ended up with the same result. You should have seen Matt's face when I set a plate of ricotta mash in front of him. We wound up smearing it on pieces of bread. 

Conclusion: Hate it because it took 3.5 hours to make something that was advertised as gnocchi, and it is not gnocchi. It's not even sort of like gnocchi. This mix of mint and spinach and cheese would make an awesome filling for ravioli or manicotti, but it is not a stand-alone dish. Urge to kill...RISING.

On a happier note, I baked bagels today, and they were spectacular. I'm from Brooklyn, NY, and I have cursed the bagels in DC, Norfolk, Pennsylvania, and Texas. I should have tried to bake my own years ago. They are perfect.

14 comments:

  1. Oh no... We haven't done this one yet, but we have done the gnocchi a la parisienne and had our share of mishaps (although that was based on a pate a choux).
    I am with you on the bagels - frankly, I don't think you can get good bread anywhere outside of NY state unless you make it yourself. And as a frequent visitor to Gulf Coast TX - I have yet to find a good bagel there.

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  2. I temporarily live in Corpus Christi, TX (hub is Navy), and the bagels here are a joke. I'm always surprised by what passes for a bagel (or pizza, or bread, or cheesecake) outside of NY, but I guess if you've never had a "real" one, you don't know what they're supposed to be. I don't understand why, if I can make perfect bagels from some random recipe, businesses can't. Grrr. I'm glad I tried baking my own, because now the mystique is gone and I never need to worry about lousy bagels again. Hooray!

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  3. Oh no! I skipped the boiling and just baked them, and while they were a bit messier after baking, they tasted great. I agree that they did take a long time to make - the quinelles were the killer for me.

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  4. I'm sorry these weren't a hit for you.

    As for bagels, I made some with my nieces (two different recipes, actually) for Baking with Julia and they were much better than anything we can get here. Our standard is Montreal bagels, but I understand that NYC bagels are wonderful, too.

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  5. Happy May Day, Ei. (that's when you originally wrote this Post.) It's 6am here in Aspen, Colorado. That's very fitting because it was 6am in Texas when you wrote this Post in 2011. I must say that this is another Post of yours that has me laughing. You hold nothing back! First, I congratulate you for even attempting this recipe. I don't think many Doristas would have made it if not for belonging to FFWD. For me, this recipe is like Paris-Brest. I waited to see everyone else's efforts and comments and will attempt it in January. Do you want to have a "Go" at it again in January with me? 3 1/2 years is a long time to hold a grudge. On a happier note. Congratulations on the Norfolk move. I know you will be happy to be back home but I certainly have enjoyed reading all about your experiences abroad. You definitely have taken advantage of being in Europe and I envy you for that. I remember when you made the move to Naples. I've always admired the adaptability of military wives and ministers/rabbis wives. Have a Happy Thanksgiving and welcome home to wonderful America --- whenever you make the move.

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  6. I know the post is 3 years old, but how frustrating! As for the bagels, there was an article I read a few years ago (probably around the time you posted this!) claiming that the special mineral composition of NYC tap water is what makes them hard to reproduce anywhere else. Anyway, it was fascinating and a unique perspective. Happy Thanksgiving!

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  7. I remember this post (and your urge to kill the gnocchi).
    Probably not worth a do over :-)
    Happy Thanksgiving.

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  8. Happy Thanksgiving and hope all is well. Not worth a repeat if the first time was a fail.

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  9. Yup, a lot of work... for something that was pretty good, but I would love to just order these in a restaurant instead.

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  10. I love your assessment of this. It took me almost as long, and I was starving because I didn't plan accordingly and didn't eat until WAY past dinner time. Not sure I'd make these again even though I enjoyed the ricotta balls. Have a happy Thanksgiving!

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  11. Sorry, but I was too distracted by the bagels to pay attention to the rest of the post. One of these days I need to figure out how to make them myself because the ones here in Germany are not worth the money. Those look amazing.

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  12. I share in your frustration of this dish. It took me quite a long time to make also but I did stretch it throughout the day. Kuddos to you for making homemade bagels. Have a Happy Thanksgiving now that you are back in the States.

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  13. Hopefully you picked up a couple of tips if you ever decide to try this one again!

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  14. LOL Im making these today and I'm so thankful for your time warning... maybe we will be eating these tomorrow.... LOL :)

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